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  1. Nats/Oceanic Championships in Australia was this weekend. So I wrote a not-so-brief tourney report. Walls of text inc.   Wed-Fri was boring as fuck. Penrith is a hole. I spent ten minutes trying to beat the security checkpoint boss at the airport.   List - We ended up playing so many different lists over the course of the weekend but I stuck with a safe list and just mirrored Jono h4h4   Only change was I played 2 Sarcs at Nats and 1/1 Sarc/Sword for Oceanics. Sword was pretty insane for me but Jono hated it.     Wake up, catch a cab to the event where we meet up with the rest of the NZ players. Shoot the shit for literal hours. Event starts, cool beans.   'turns out jake steals cartons of smokes from his work and was handing them out like candy/selling packs for 10 a pop' - Bodan.  So I was set on smokes all weekend which made 30 hours of YGO over three days nearly bearable.   Rd1 - Wil Evers (Books) 2-0   G1: I open a solid hand with a Rejuv. I double tribute a pair of dragons to get off a rejuv for six? I think they chain and I have infinite cards. G2: He opens a really mediocre hand. I win a few turns after he drops a fairly naked Jowgen via Chalice on my Blaster + summon Burner.   Rd2 - Chris Short (Dragons) 2-1   G1: I lose to a mained Scarecrow. I was kinda salt but not tilted because hey you can dodge books all day right? G2: I make a Colo and ride it to victory via Emptiness. I attempt to setup game with a cute ECon play (summon a Lightning into his set baby hoping to attack then ECon tribute and get a direct hit with Colo for game) but he had set Veiler and I just win. G3: I win after he plays his Raigeki Break slightly wrong and I'm able to push through his Draco + Gaios board, he tries to setup a Return play but can't break my board due to Emptiness, card is fucking insane.   Rd3 - Anthony Marr (Water) 2-1   G1: I lose as I Card Destruction away a really weak hand, and he evidently draws into the nuts (double goons Glacia reborn) I veiler the Glacia and he reborns my veiler, drops tidal and bladers my naked dragon. G2: I win off Dragons being the best. G3: I blader him at some point when he's fishing for answers, get into a big-eye fight and win in time because all of the Eyes have no materials.   Rd4: Russel (Books) 2-0   G1: I open veiler + rejuv + offcolors and rip droll off my rejuv. G2: He opens a pretty rancid hand and has to summon Justice (idk why this was still in his deck post-board) and I have perfect knowledge of his hand when he banishes it. He reborns my tidal and tries to push for beats (hoping to game me with Priestess next turn) and I hole -> all four dragons and kill him, he tries to fate my shit without a spellcaster. No dice.   Rd5 - Marcus Rokman (Dragons) 0-2   G1: I draw a pretty mediocre hand and lose quickly. G2: See G1.   Rd 6 - Anchong (Dragunity) 1-2   G1: Dragunity. o ok. I die. G2: I kill him dead with some dragons. G3: He Mind Drains me then OTKs me. Nice.   Rd 7 - Dimitri (Books) 1-2   G1: I lose, books etc. G2: I win, despite getting nearly blown-out by a second Jowgen when I storm him for 3 + Tower. His face when I Puppet Planted his Kycoo over Jowgen and then went spazzy with Dragossacks made this enjoyable. G3: I open double droll and no gas, lose despite drolling him.   Rd 8 - Opponent (Water) 2-1   G1: I get nutted on pretty bad. G2: I magically win. Think I made like Double Sac t1 or some other standard dragons bullshit. G3: I open Chalice + Veiler for his double goons marks Megalo into second Megalo push. I win in time off Thought Ruler Archfiend + Vanity's Emptiness.   5-3 and I scrape at 51/64 off some good breakers (Rokman was 3rd? after swiss, and the rest of my loseses were 1x in swiss)   I check the player standings and almost everybody had a draw. Fucking Australians play slow as balls.   We don't finish til late as all fuck so all the food places are closed except for a Subway. We had Subway wraps in the streets of Penrith. We wake up on time, all of us manage to shower and get our shit together. I call a cab for 9:30 or w/e and the cab doesn't get there til 9:55. We just barely make it to the event and dodge the Taxi FTK.   T64: Kenny Xu (Verz) 2-0   G1: I try and Blocker his Ophion t1- he has Veiler. I Tempest for Blaster and just pray for a Fire as my topdeck. Gets there, make some dudes, kill him dead. G2: He sets a BR and passes. I Stream out a Tidal and set Ryko Decree. He sets a BR and passes. I endphase the Decree. I summon up a Dragon and he Maxx "C"'s me, I make Scrap and flip my Ryko to clear his board of backrow and put 82 or something on the board.   He seemed a bit salty but he opened stone garbage g2 so I can't blame him.   T32: James Moore (Dragons) 1-2   G1: I lose. G2: I win. G3: We wall with Redoxes back and forth- so I assume he doesn't have a way to game me, but after Rejuvenating for four on t1 I know he must be close, so I push with a Blader over a naked Dragon and get Veilered, then OTKed back. He shows me a hand of Swift Virus after the ECon for game, nice.   Oh well, I lost to my friend so it's not a big deal. He then loses in T16 to Marcus Rokman.   - Jono and Kosc have to duke it out for Top 8, and Kosc wins in time with a fucking Obelisk. - Kosc and Rokman play it out for 3rd/4th. Kosc loses his second 3rd/4th playoff at a Nats, after losing to Bodan in 2011. - There was a point where somebody, I think it was AJ, said he could have decked himself with Rejuvs. That was nice. - My teammate Marcus Wheeler goes undefeated throughout the day and beats AJ for the National title and a fully sick WiFi 16G iPad Mini, and a super prize card. Nice.   So we go out for celebratory steaks, and the kiwis come along. Casual table for 30 people at the steakhouse. Was nice.   Oceanics:   Rd1: Khoi Vo (Six Sams) 2-0   G1: I special Tidal t1 by removing a pair of bigs from my hand and attack into a Chamberlain of the 6S. I just start thinking to myself "Are you fucking kidding me?" G2: I get Bladered but have Psi-Blocker to not die, then push back with dragons + Colossal into mp2 Sac to his 0 cards.   Rd2: Callum Borck (Dragons) 1-2   G1: I lose to getting my Blader chaliced/veilered 3 times in a row while I protected it. After the game he told me he ripped Veiler in his drawphases back-to-back so I was pretty salty. G2: I open Rejuv + offcolor babies+bigs into Rejuv into Rejuv. He makes a play and gets veilered and scoops. G3: He rejuvs me for 12 t1. My hand is baby hole emptiness emptiness baby mst. (I boarded in the MST as respect for Emptiness) I set the Emptinesses + MST and he pushes for damage with a Kycoo. I end up bricking my draw and just scoop after making an irrelevant play.   Also Kye loses to a Waboku in g3 in this round while sitting next to me.   Rd3: Opponent (Deck) 2-0?   I don't really remember this match so it must have been pretty uneventuful- no nutdraws here just a solid game I guess.   Somewhere in here Marcus Wheeler, our national champion, gets Judge FTKed for writing the shittiest "3" ever for the MSTs in his board.   Rd4: Gareth (Dragons) 2-0   G1: He opens pretty rancid and I open double sac + rejuv into unknown deck and it gets me there. G2: He opens what seems like stone garbage and I make a Blader play, it gets Veilered and then he t sets. I stupidly Dracossack the br when it's obviously Chalice and nearly lose, but I have hand-traps and go the distance.   Rd5: Opponent (Verz) 2-0   G1: I make a Sac he can't really do shit. G2: He makes an Ophion sets Pandemic and guns Iron Wall in my dp. I Blaster Ophion, Redox back the Blaster and summon Veiler to make Thought Ruler. It goes the distance for 3-4 turns, and then I draw Card D and play it trying to draw Storm/MST to kill him- I draw MST and do so.   Rd6: Sam (Dragons) 2-1   G1: I get shitstomped by the nuts rejuv hand. G2: I open pretty insane and win. G3: I open alright and get into Blader on t2/t3 after sitting behind a Wall, and then spend 10 turns trying to kill him with a Blader after I Emptiness him while he does nothing hoping to draw an out. I'm 5sure he has at least one Swift, so after hitting him to 2k + burning his Book of Moon to protect himself, I get a Scarecrow. On the following turn I break Emptiness with Rejuv and kill him with Blader + Blaster + Book for the second Scarecrow.   Rd7: Patrick Diaz (Books) 1-1   G1: He just completely roflstomps me after taking a while to get rolling. Mained Lily brings the beats- I top a dead Droll the turn after he goes off. G2: I open on the Big-Eye set a bluff EEV plan and he plays around it- I win in time off damage as I'm scared to do anything that reveals I don't actually have the EEV, and he's scared of being blown out by it.   I'd like to add that during this match I see Yaoweii, who was playing Kye, on the table below me, burn Kye for 29k with a Tempest Magician, and then Kye flat-out fucks him with a Jester Lord for 8k on his second turn.   T16: Justin Zappy (Books) 0-2   G1: I open stone garbage + Droll. He has a hand that plays around Droll. I make a cute Big Eye play hoping to turn off his Tower and then kill him next turn- he rips Priestess and shits on my soul. G2: I open stone garbage. Remember Kye telling me about summoning Big Eye and setting a backrow even not playing EEV is cool. Do it. He plays into the nonexistant EEV and rapes my soul.   Oh well, prize card + top cut mat heals all wounds.   I chill after my mauling in top to go and chat with friends/give Jono shit about going 1-3 drop. At one point I hear that a guy in T8 won his match off playing United We Stand on his Crimson Blader. I remember this is Australia and that's probably par for the course.   My team-mate Chris loses in T4 to the eventual winner, Chris Mattiske, and Kye (CheeseCake) ends up winning his T4 game against United-We-Stand Dragons for the trip to Worlds. Then gets 2-0'd in 10 minutes in the finals.    Wake up and head back to sunny Brisbane where it's approximately 50 times warmer than the hell-hole that is Sydney.   It was fun seeing all the ygo players from across Australia again, and I look forward to next year when Nationals will be held in my home town, Brisbane. shud b gud.   Oh, and Bodan borrowed my Spellbook deck.   Props --   + Dragons being beyond-insane + Bodan being the most filthy degen ever. Again. + Not getting stormed the entire weekend. + Scarf being the raddest thing ever + Kye making it to worlds + Vanity's Emptiness for being the embodiment of most retarded card ever + 40 minute rounds + 20 minute turnarounds for pairings is the greatest for getting smoke breaks every round.   Slops --   - Jono going 1-3 drop at Oceanics. Go Jono. - Hanson losing in Top 4 for a repeat progressive Top 4 loss. - Penrith being literally the worst place ever. - The aircon being like 8 celsius and me spending the entire weekend playing in a huge jacket. - Not having a mobile phone the entire weekend because Jono has something from the stone-age. - Never getting to Colo Chalice anybody out. Fuck I really wanted to do this at least once.