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more of a "I want to write about this sweet deck" than a tournament report, so let's start off with the list I played:

 

Goatless Zoo

 

Monsters: 18

3 Exarion Universe

3 Berserk Gorilla

2 Abyss Soldier

2 Bazoo the Soul Eater

2 D.D. Assailant

1 Sangan

1 Exiled Force

1 Sinister Serpent

1 D.D. Warrior Lady

1 Tribe-Infecting Virus

1 Breaker the Magical Warrior

 

Spells:9

2 Nobleman of Crossout

1 Mystical Space Typhoon

1 Pot of Greed

1 Premature Burial

1 Reinforcement of the Army

1 Heavy Storm

1 Graceful Charity

1 Delinquent Duo

 

Traps: 13
3 Sakuretsu Armor

3 Trap Dustshoot

2 Dust Tornado

1 Mirror Force

1 Torrential Tribute

1 Ring of Destruction

1 Skill Drain

1 Call of the Haunted

 

Side: 15

3 Kycoo the Ghost Destroyer

3 Dekoichi the Battlechanted Locomotive

3 Book of Moon

2 Rush Recklessly

1 D.D. Survivor

1 Tsukuyomi

1 Chiron the Mage

1 Smashing Ground

 

Extra: 31

3 Every Legal Fusion I could find. Never know when someone is gonna Exchange you a Metamorphosis.

 

Let's start with the big ideas behind the deck:

 

1. Nobleman of Crossout is a 2-of staple in every deck.

This is the big point I start most of my goat format brews on. If we start the game with 0 monsters in our deck to set, and our opponent draws a Nobleman of Crossout, that's very similar to resolving a Delinquent Duo. NoC is so good against a majority of the field that you can exploit how inbred the metagame is by simply not setting monsters, and get a huge edge against the field. 

 

2. Trap Dustshoot is an insane Yugioh card.

However, grindy control decks are very poor at utilizing it. The best Dustshoots are backed by strong pressure, something the Goat deck just isn't able to do early on. The information the goat deck gains off a turn 1 dustshoot is quickly made irrelevant as the draw-go game goes on longer, however, when you're trying to tempo your opponent out and lock the game up early, knowing all their cards for a turn or two holds incredible value. Is is dead occasionally? Sure. Is that risk balanced by the number of games it wins almost singlehandedly? Definitely. 

 

3. Standard goat decks are garbage for the first few turns of the game.

It's just true, and it isn't that apparent until you start brewing the format. If all you play are goat mirrors, both decks are slow so you don't really notice too much, but the tempo difference between Zoo and Goats is disgusting, and even when games don't end quickly, they often need to use so many cards to stay alive that you win the long game. While I say the deck wants to end the game by turn 6-7, I don't necessarily mean I need my opponent's life at zero, I just need their resources spent enough that cleaning up becomes trivial. Every Scapegoat they activate might keep them alive, but it digs their hole deeper. Their Exarions end up trading with D.D. Assailants after they get damage in, or worse: eaten by Berserk Gorillas / Bazoos.

 

4. Hindsight is 20/20

There is so much stuff that just wasn't explored fully during goat format, but found to later be insane. Trap Dustshoot is the obvious example, but Skill Drain is another. People didn't really realize the value of "Stick Drain, all my guys are bigger than yours so I don't care if my effects are negated" until probably 2010 (?) when Jeff Jones won the (First? Anaheim?) YCS with that Destiny Hero Skill Drain deck. The value of floodgates in general was under appreciated for a very long time. The first drafts of this deck, probably a year or so ago started with 3 Skill Drain (and 3 Return, lol) over time, these numbers got trimmed down as drawing multiples was a bigger problem than seeing zero copies of each card. It's definitely weird to see a singleton Skill Drain in a decklist given the kind of card it is, but the card is just so high-impact against goat control I don't see any reason to cut it. 

Solemn Judgment was the most interesting hindsight card, I'm actually curious how people playing standard lists analyzed Solemn as I heard a lot of people were running the card. In the end, Matt informed me a lot of people were going to be running Solemn, which was really the final straw in cutting the card from the deck. I'm not even sure if Solemn is correct in general, in a field of no Solemns. Sakuretsu often fills the same role, without the drawback of making us real weak to topdecked Rings of Destruction. 

 

Matt and I were running Snatch Steal for the longest time because "it's Snatch Steal." It rarely played well, and always got sided out, but "it's Snatch Steal." I realized we were just being retarded and cut it entirely a few months ago, a move I don't think Matt agreed with until Saturday morning where I was prepared to hide every copy of Snatch Steal he had just so he couldn't play it.

 

The most recent addition to the deck was the Abyss Soldier package, which as you may have read in Matt's report, "is either the monster in the format, or a La Jinn that doesn't die to Tsukuyomi" Which isn't that impressive until you consider Exarion is, almost all the time, just a La Jinn that doesn't die to Tsukuyomi. And we play 3 of it. Yeah, Abyss Soldier is the nuts. Before Abyss, we didn't have any reason to run Sangan or Sinister, two of the best cards in the format, in this deck. So really in adding 2 Abyss, we had to find room for 4 more cards, which led to some pretty drastic restructuring of the lineups, and led to us cutting Return from the main.

 

The side is kinda cool, though there's a lot of room to do stuff with it. (Un?)fortunately, nobody seems to realize how terrible Nobleman of Crossout is against this deck, so Dekoichis rarely go in, but when they do they're absolutely insane. When you go Dekoichi + Sakuretsu Armor turn 1, it's like you're playing 2007 Gadgets against 2005 Goats, it isn't even fair. 

 

There's a lot of fear of Royal Decree as you can probably tell, in every matchup I'd side out a fair portion of my traps for Books, Rushes, and the Smashing to try to devalue their Decrees, continuing with the deckbuilding principle of "I'd rather brick it than answer it." After I see Decree, or Messenger of Peace, I'll board in the Chrion, but I typically don't bring him in blind. The Kycoos stem from a, probably irrational, fear of the Chaos decks, which this deck struggles with (2300 > 2000) and Kycoo basically autowins against that deck, so I figure making a difficult matchup into a good matchup was worth a couple side slots, even if it's unlikely I see the deck. The singleton Survivor is just a solid "gotcha" for the people playing a RotA toolbox, and Tsukuyomi punishes the other difficult matchup: Monarchs, and the mirror.

 

Anyways, the obligatory tournament report:

Somehow in the car ride there we start talking about Allen Pennington, and Kevin mentions that he's constantly mistaken for him, but doesn't really know who Allen is. So naturally, we blast Allen's hit single, "Master of Cards" and watch a couple Fruit Reviews during the 2 hour ride to Toywiz. In summary, Kevin knows the following facts about Allen walking into Toywiz:

1. Allen is the MC, Master of Cards.

2. Allen is "always fresh," and "Never wears a dirty tee."

3. Allen never drops a game, and always says "GG."

4. Allen thinks Pineapples are user friendly.

5. Allen does not think very highly of Prickly Pears.

6. Allen's catch phrase is, "Not everyone can be a master."

7. Allen knows Value when he sees it. 

 

Armed with these 7 facts, we aim to convince as many people, for as long as possible, that Kevin is Allen C. Pennington. Fact 7 is particularly interesting, as while Allen might know value when he sees it, Kevin most certainly doesn't. So to avoid blowing his cover over something stupid, we inform him to avoid using the word "value" entirely.

 

We thought his cover was blown immediately as soon as Kris asks Kevin's name, "You might know me by my other name ... ... ACP" in the most awkward tone of voice possible, both Matt and I erupt in laughter, thinking it was over before it even began, but Kris is apparently the most gullible person alive, and believes him. This is when we talk to everyone that might possibly blow his cover and tell them what's going on, they all think it's hilarious and agree to play along.

 

Armed with his 3 Des Koala Goat Control list, 'Allen,' fresh off his trip from Florida to play some goats, sits for his round 1 feature match, which should hopefully be posted on Thursday according to Perovic. 

 

Anyway, my round 1 went poorly. I start with a t1 Dustshoot to ship his only monster: Serpent, then get Duo'd. I start off strong, 3 backrow and a good board, but he tops CotH for Jinzo before my ring can deal lethal damage, and I never find an out to the Jinzo. Game 2 I Rush Recklessly over his Airknight, which was his only real play all game. Game 3 he had turn 1 Duo + Grace, followed up with an early BLS. Rough beats, whatever.

 

Round 2 I play Ned, and have basically everything game 1, it was a hodgepodge of cards, no trinity or anything, but the perfect answers to all his plays. Game 2 was so disgusting though. Turn 1 Pot + Grace, pitching serpent. Turn 2 Duo + Storm. No coming back from that. Game 3 I duo him, but he breaks even by playing a Pot on his first turn. I eventually find a spot where I'm comfortable activating Grace to sculpt my hand without Serpent, and block all his set monsters with NoCs, and Exiled Forces.

 

Round 3 I play Hector and 2-0 him pretty quick, I basically just summoned Gorillas until he ran out of cards. Might've been some trinity involved, I really don't recall, but they weren't particularly close games. 

 

Round 4 I play Jazz. Every game my deck did what it wants to do, game 1 Skill Drain got in there, game 2 he managed to draw with a Ring of Destruction in a gamestate that looked pretty lost for him, then game 3 I did zoo things again and took the match 2-0 in a very long 3 game set. Great games man, had to get you back for the loss in the war league :P

 

Top 8 I play THE Allen C. Pennington. Matt played him in round 2 and got blown out by Decrees (which I let him borrow) However, I'm much more prepared for Decree than Matt was. Easiest 3-0 of the tournament tbh. Game 1 he tried to be the beatdown, which started off alright for him as he had a draw with plenty of big monsters, but I stabilize with a Skill Drain on his Tribe, and wrap the game up while at 200 life. Game 2 I feel like I'm in a solid position no matter what my draw is, but when my topdeck turns out to be Pot of Greed I'm pretty confident. Then that Greed draws me into Grace + Serpent. Nice game. Game 3 Dekoichi drew like 3 cards in combination with a Tsukuyomi I accidentally left in the deck while smokescreening.

 

And that was the fall of the master. Afterwards he goes to play friendlies with Perovic and gets 3-0'd there as well. 

 

Top 4 vs. Matt, we agree to split. The mirror is miserable and we both know it. Game 1 was a disaster. We draw our opening hands, I show him I accidentally left a Dekoichi in my deck and side properly, shuffle back up and we're good to go. As is tradition when I play Matt, I, of course, end up unintentionally cheating him. I had read somewhere that the psv wording on Dust Tornado was the most recent wording during goat format (which is obviously wrong after some basic research) and played an MST the turn I set it: hitting his would-be lethal Ring of Destruction. Apparently Furman had told Matt the same thing was true, so he didn't even question it. Naturally, I'm like, "damn, I just made this sick play 90% of people would overlook, and it just totally won me the game" to which I'm told the card does not actually work that way, and I just cheated on camera :(

Though I suppose in true 2005 spirit, "I cheat so wut I win."

 

Game 2 I feel like I'm going to wrap the game up real easily...Until he flips the Return I forgot he was siding. RIP. Game 3 I have the Abyss Soldier + Premature loop and he just concedes to it. Game 4 I get Returned from a winning position again, then g5 I spend like 5 or 6 minutes trying to find the best play I had, and end up prematuring Gorilla, summon Abyss, pitch Tribe to bounce Premat, then Premat Tribe. Attack over his 1900 Bazoo and pass with a real strong field, and 2 set backrow. Then he has Storm + Exiled + Smashing + Premat to kill me. Happens.

Yeah, probably finding room to put Return back in the main, even with only 2 Bazoos. 

 

Both Matt and his opponent go full-helmet in the finals match, and Matt miraculously wins the series 3-2 in what could've easily been a 3-0 sweep for either player. 

 

Allen escapes with his cover in-tact, Goat Control didn't make the finals, and I vicariously won the tournament through Matt. 

 

11/10, would travel 2.5 hours to toywiz for goat again. 

 

Fuck Goats; Get Paid.

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┬╗Tygo    14143

I've seen this report/heard this story somewhere.............

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ACP    33425

 In summary, Kevin knows the following facts about Allen walking into Toywiz:

1. Allen is the MC, Master of Cards.

2. Allen is "always fresh," and "Never wears a dirty tee."

3. Allen never drops a game, and always says "GG."

4. Allen thinks Pineapples are user friendly.

5. Allen does not think very highly of Prickly Pears.

6. Allen's catch phrase is, "Not everyone can be a master."

7. Allen knows Value when he sees it. 

 

Armed with these 7 facts, we aim to convince as many people, for as long as possible, that Kevin is Allen C. Pennington. Fact 7 is particularly interesting, as while Allen might know value when he sees it, Kevin most certainly doesn't. So to avoid blowing his cover over something stupid, we inform him to avoid using the word "value" entirely.

Good stuff

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